FAQ: Writing Letters: What to Expect

Please do not expect a pen-pal relationship. You will receive letters regularly, but not necessarily after every letter you write. Your child is living and learning under circumstances much different from those in the United States.  

Sometimes letters are written as part of a class exercise and may seem a little impersonal or formal. And cultural differences may cause your child's letters to seem excessively pious or grateful. 

Your sponsorship is an opportunity to mentor your child. As your relationship slowly develops, your consistent presence fosters trust and tells your child "I care about you and want to be a part of your life." Your relationship should improve over time, as your child matures and learns to write more personal letters.

Yes. Your letters are life-changing. They matter as much as your financial generosity.  

A child who understands his or her true value to God has taken the first step in overcoming poverty. And the easiest way for you to help your child take that step is to be involved in his or her life by writing letters. 

As a sponsor you are in a position to model Christ's love. Your letters establish you as a significant person in your child's life. You are acting as a mentor.

Sponsored children treasure every letter they receive, and many children read their letters repeatedly, eagerly sharing them with visitors. Even into adulthood Compassion graduates emphasize the importance and influence their sponsors' letters had in their lives. Regardless of cultural and age differences, everyone grows stronger with consistent messages of love and support. 

Plus, letters are an important part of your child's development. Exchanging letters improves your child's basic literacy skills and his or her self-awareness and ability to put thoughts and feelings into words.  

And keep in mind that topics you consider uninteresting, or that you feel you've discussed before, are viewed differently by a child in the developing world. 

Every day poverty tells children, "You don't matter." But that is a lie, and your letters demonstrate that. They say, "You do matter, Suzana." "I care about you, Renato." "Jesus loves you, Lerionga."

You can read more about the importance of letter writing from a sponsor's perspective on the Compassion blog.

You will receive a minimum of three letters a year from your sponsored child, in addition to a new photograph every two years.

How often should I write?

Correspondence between you and your child is not "overnight mail," but it is efficient — given the remote areas many of the children live in. Delivery may take anywhere from a few weeks to a few months. Writing online shortens the delivery time because your "letter" goes directly to the Compassion field office in your child's country.

• Follow Larry the Letter's journey from Colorado to Ecuador.
• Follow Lucy the Letter's journey back from Ecuador to the United States.

Strict mailing and customs regulations in our various countries dictate the type of items letters may contain. A letter that contains an "unusual" item can delay an entire shipment of sponsor correspondence in customs for weeks.  

You can learn more about what takes place after you write your letter by taking a look at these Compassion blog posts:

• Inside the Letter-Writing Process: Ghana
• The Journey of One Letter

• The Impact of Letter Writing

Communicating between cultures is difficult. And this is especially true with written communication. It becomes even more apparent when the written communication is between an adult and a child in different cultures.  

Many children in developing countries can't imagine that anyone would be interested in the details of their lives (e.g., how tall they are or how much they weigh). They may not think the sponsor really wants to know, or it may be considered vain to discuss personal things. 

A child may be reluctant to open up because sharing is emotionally risky or the child may fear a cultural stigma or repercussions. However, children are encouraged to discuss their faith and to share what is happening in their lives and the lives of their families. 

Developing trust in a relationship is difficult enough without having to cross cultural, geographic and age boundaries. Your consistent letters and your messages of love and support are invaluable and immeasurable. Your words of encouragement give inspiration and hope to a soul living with despair and rejection. As a mentor, your letters plant seeds that will bear fruit in your child's life and in the lives of your child's family and friends. 

"Still other seed fell on good soil, where it produced a crop — a hundred, sixty or thirty times what was sown."
                                           — Matthew 13:8, NIV

Many children in the developing world don't immediately grasp the concept of "conversations" by mail and must be trained to develop the skill. Your love, understanding and encouragement should help you see progress over time as the child's writing skills mature. 

Often, when a child receives a letter from his sponsor, he takes it home to show his family and then saves it in a "special place." Several weeks later, the center staff schedule a time for children to write letters to their sponsors and the children may not have the last letters with them and may not be able to remember the questions that were asked. 

Frequently, a center worker or teacher will sit down with a younger child and write on the child's behalf. Questions can sometimes be overlooked or forgotten because of this.

Sometimes letters are written as part of a class exercise. The child may thank you for a photo when you didn't send one because a suggestion on the blackboard mentioned thanking for a photo (if one had been received).

A center worker or teacher usually writes on behalf of younger children. Sometimes a parent will, but this is not as common; many parents can't read or write themselves.  

Most sponsored children start to write their own letters when they reach the fourth grade. Children with special needs and those whose schooling has started late may require the assistance of a staff member for a longer time.

When children are registered, they are often too young to spell their own names. A parent, who is often illiterate, will spell the name for the child, as best as the parent can. In time, the spelling may be determined to be incorrect because a family member learned how to spell it correctly or the child's birth certificate has been found (if there is one).  

Additionally, in many cultures there is more than one correct way to spell a name; therefore, a child's case study may give different spellings each time it is processed.

We reserve the right to decline to forward any letters and materials that we view as incompatible with our ministry approach, including but not limited to:

• items that advocate another religious worldview
• materials that condone lifestyle choices inconsistent with our ministry values and beliefs.

We also reserve the right to decline to forward materials that:

• might be considered inappropriate in the child's culture
• threaten the safety of the child in any way
• depict or describe the use of alcoholic beverages, tobacco products, unlawful drugs or materials or activities that we regard as dangerous
• depict persons dressed in immodest clothing

If you have additional questions about writing to your child, please contact one of our Sponsor Relations Representatives at (800) 336-7676 (toll free in the continental United States).